For the last couple of weeks, I have seen a great drop in my spiritual practice and attention since being alone. I’m surprised as I had hoped this time away from home would inspire me to treat these weeks like a retreat, but it seems instead the change of environment has actually had a somewhat negative impact on my practice. I know it is all a process and, like everything else, spiritual practice ebbs and flows, but I am definitely in a bit of a lull- and I’m feeling it! From my body to my heart to my mind. I definitely feel kind of yucky.
It looks like Krishna may be showing you what He shows all of us: the best spiritual retreat is in the association of good devotees.
The good news is that the happy, enthusiastic, Krishna conscious you is the real eternal you. The mind is subject to different weather patterns and sometimes heavy fog rolls in. But if we just keep chanting Hare Krishna and performing our regular spiritual duties, the Sun of Krishna will burn away the fog and we will return to our real, joyful life.
We all feel yucky at times, but even that is an opportunity to learn more about ourselves and Krishna. Personally, I’m doing very well by the mercy of guru and Krishna and I feel great enthusiasm to try to help Prabhupada in his mission. Actually, that’s the secret: the more we try to please Krishna and help fallen souls, the more we feel happy. In the inevitable moments when we feel morose or dull, we can just power forward with our duties and blast thru the fog. It’s fun!